November 30-December 6
Apparently I’m a much bigger pansy than I had originally thought.
G and I went to a birthing class at our clinic this week. We’ve already finished the 6 week course the hospital puts on, but our doctor recommended we go to this one as well because it’s more specific to what we can expect from them throughout the labor and delivery process. It was only an hour and was free, so we decided to check it out. It was put on by one of the doctors who did a slide show presentation and gave a general labor and delivery overview. She talked A LOT about epidurals and had plenty of slides with pictures. I ignored the pictures but listened to what she had to say, and I handled it like a champ. Of course G was worried since I had fainted a few weeks ago after some epidural talk, so he kept looking at me–ready to catch me if I fell out of my chair–and asking if I was okay. It made me a little bit queasy but nothing major.
But then she shifted gears and went straight from epidural talk to episiotomy talk! For those of you who don’t know what an episiotomy is, I’m not going to tell you. I’m not interested in being the one to shed light on this topic for you–and trust me, you should take comfort in your ignorance. I’m jealous of you.
So like I said, right away she goes from epidurals to episiotomies–just like that! I don’t know about the rest of the people in that room, but this girl could’ve used a buffer! Maybe a little light-hearted discussion about baby names? Or some witty banter about those crazy pregnancy hormones? Nope. We went from straight from needles to slicing and dicing.
And this was not a topic she was about to glaze over. Oh no. She discussed it in so much detail AND EVEN HAD PICTURES to go along with her presentation! At first I thought I was going to throw up. I could feel my throat glands getting all tingly and could visualize the horrid scene of me puking all over the seat of the poor person in front of me. I took a drink of water and that seemed to help my stomach but then I started feeling REALLY light-headed. I tried so hard to focus on something other than what she was saying by rapping a Jay Z song in my head and mentally brushing my shoulders off–but there was no use. I started losing my vision and that’s when I knew I was going down. I grabbed G’s leg and he instantly knew. He remembered what we were told last time and had me lean forward to put my head between my legs–as much as I could lean forward with this big belly in the way! I almost thought that made me feel WORSE as I broke out into a furious sweat.
But no fainting!
I sat like that for a few minutes and eventually regained my composure. I couldn’t believe it worked! I thought for sure I was going to faint and fall out of my damn chair right there in the middle of class. It was SO REASSURING to know that the head between my legs thing was effective because I’ve been a worried about potentially fainting again. It’s such a relief to know it can be prevented!
I’ve always believed that knowledge is power–but I’m slowly coming around to the “ignorance is bliss” line of thinking. There are just some things I don’t care to know. Or see.
Consider me officially retired from birthing class.
Additional Pregnancy Week 35 Posts:
35 Week Baby Bump
Maternity Sweater
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“Brushing my shoulders off” that’s hilarious. BTW I googled episiotomy. Immediate regret.
I feel light-headed just reading about all of this! You are definitely not a pansy! You weren’t dramatic about it; you were logical and calm (relatively, lol) and knew when to let someone know you weren’t well. Good job! You handled it like a champ!
Ohh, I get really faint as well, when people talk about gross things. It started when I greyed out in the middle of a Grade 9 health class! I’m scared for my birthing classes!
Just thought I’d offer a little advice from a labor and delivery nurse’s perspective! Being scared of needles is not a good reason to NOT get an epidural, because usually people get in a cycle where they are scared of the needles and the pain, and just end up spending their whole labor terrified in general. Fear makes you tense and tenseness makes the pain worse! There are good reasons to not want an epidural- longer pushing stage, higher rates of c-sections, the inability to move during labor, etc. Labor tends to be quicker and easier in bodies that are active and healthy, which you seem to be. Natural labor is totally doable if that is your plan! It has some great benefits for you and your baby. I highly recommend reading “Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth” (very hippy but also very good) and watching Ricki Lake’s documentary “The Business of Being Born.” I would also ask your OB what his/her rates of epidural use, episiotomy, and C-section are. Episiotomies are RARELY necessary, but some doctors do them routinely anyway. Also, labor goes much more smoothly and easily when you are able to walk and move around! A lot of people don’t think about these things in the beginning of their pregnancy, but they are things worth thinking about! If your OB scoffs and/or won’t tell you his/her statistics, or generally just takes the attitude of “I’m the doctor, I’ll make the decisions,” GET ANOTHER ONE. It’s never too late. If he/she is receptive and responsive to your questions, that is a good sign.
Phew, sorry to bombard you with such a long comment. I just see so many people who didn’t realize the options they have when it comes to childbirth and they have disappointing outcomes because of it.
Oh yeah, one other thing- hire a doula! They are worth every penny if you find one you feel comfortable with. They are experienced at helping women cope with labor and have been shown to decrease c-section rates and epidural rates! Plus they are the only person in the room who’s sole responsibility is keeping you calm, comfortable, and focused without being super emotionally invested like your husband or family member is!
Nope………you are not a pansy. I just wanted to tell you that on the radio while I was driving in this morning they were discussing women who wear high heels a lot have stronger pelvic muscles. This should help with your delivery! Of course they used it in context that those women (who wear high heels a lot) have better “big O’s”!
Seriously…..I only had one and it ended up being a C-section, but my sister had 3 and episiotomies with 2 and she said she could not even feel it and she had completely natural (no drugs) deliveries!
I also get very faint when I see or talk about needles (or hear about those scissors!), but I was induced, had an epidural AND had an episiotomy! And everything turned out fine!
i can’t think about it. I’ve had three babies, three deliveries and NO episiotomy and only 1 epidurral.
Whew! That was a close one! Glad you managed not to pass out!
I too found out about episiotomies late in the game. (No one ever tells you what happens AFTER the baby… just about labor.) I was induced, had an epidural (and a really fast labor for a first timer – 6 hours) and had a episotomy because Avery had her leg up by her head when she was delivered.
The dr. said that generally she doesn’t do episotomies and that I was an exception. I was worried that it would be super painful, and it was for the first 2 weeks, but it wasn’t too bad after that.
Just thought I’d keep it real and put that out there… I think the thought of it is worse than it actually is!
Last time I had a blood test I fainted. “cough to keep your blood pressure up!” the nurse told me. I coughed myself into oblivion.
I’m telling you, I went in to both of my births with little info. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I read all of the books, I am educated, but as far as knowing every little thing…I knew that wasn’t for me and it went fine. I am a self described pansy when it comes to stuff like that. It will all go the way it’s supposed to and in the moment you won’t care about half the stuff they are doing to get your baby out safe and sound.
Afterwards is a whole different story:)
Jennifer
I will never forget when we had some friends over right before Brayden was born, and my friend’s husband was explaining to my husband what an episiotomy was- his reaction was priceless.
Don’t get too freaked out- I did, and when you are in that moment, you will do whatever it takes to get that little one into your arms, and you won’t even bat an eye.
I highly recommend the epidural- even though I ended up having to have a C-section, I was glad that part of my labor was actually enjoyable.
Well, dang it. I just *had* to google it, didn’t I? OMG!
I’m glad the head between your knees thing is working for you. I use that trick too as I’m prone to being faint (more so when I was younger) but have never fainted thanks to that trick. I’m curious, were you prone to light headed-ness before your pregnancy? Or has it been a result of your pregnancy?
Yep, that sounds pretty horrifying. Although I’m surprised by the big episiotomy lecture because most doctors rarely do them anymore as it is much better (heals faster, etc.) to tear naturally if it’s going to happen…
You’re too funny. I already know what an episiotomy is for some horrid reason, but I’ve never had the privilege of seeing pictures up close and personal. Good luck, girl. Until my day comes, I don’t envy ANYONE that has to go through labor.
I don’t know why she felt pictures were needed! A simple explanation would have been PLENTY! I’m sure everyone could have used their imaginations. If someone was really curious as to what it looked like, let them go home and Google it.
How does she even have photos of it anyway?! I’d be ticked if I was in the middle of pushing out my baby and some dumbass nurse or doctor asked, “By they way, can we take a picture of your hoo-ha being cut for furture generations?”
I second the comment about most practitioners not even doing episiotomies anyway. I think it’s good that you are retiring from birthing class. It sounds like it’s more trouble than it’s worth.
5 weeks or less! What the heck!
jbhat
AHHHH DUUUUUDE!!! I haven’t even finished ready the full post before I’m commenting.
I googled episiotomy and was not prepared for all the vagina pictures that popped up first!! A little bit of a warning would have been nice.
And my vajayjay hurts too after reading the Wiki article about it. For the love of all things holy.
LB
I had to have an episiotomy, I didn’t feel it at the time, but afterwards when I was in the recovery room a few hours later it kicked in. Let me tell you, the drugs they give you afterward, really help. Thankfully, they were OK to use while breastfeeding.
Also, whether or not you do have one be sure to take the peri bottle they give you home! If they give you more than one, take them! Those and the tucks helped, and I used my peri bottle throughout my entire recovery. I found the pads they gave me to be better than any of the usual name brands you find in drug stores, but I ran out of those fast. Also, I know it’s a little gross, but at my hospital they give you mesh underwear to wear while in the hospital. These helped my recovery, I don’t know why they did, but they did. I took the one’s they gave me home in a ziplock baggy and washed them so that I could use them again. I know it sounds weird and I would not have done so, if the head nurse did not recommend to do so and I am really glad I did. Luckily our L&D class teacher was exceptionally good and gave us all a lot of “insider” tips that I was glad to have.
OMG – I know what one is but don’t EVER want to see pictures of it! I’m with you about the ignorance is bliss part of things. I think we’ll take the classes but I’ll have my eyes shut for most of it!
Not long now!!!! Yipeeee!
FYI – has anyone mentioned to buy pads yet? Make sure you buy the super absorbent night ones. And not the ones with the plastic type coating on them eithre (is that Always?). Stayfree overnights with wings were my friend for a few weeks.
Oh the joys of post partum!
oh for sure to the pads thing~stock up, no tampons allowed~throw out the thongs for a while and bust out the granny panties~~I don’t know if cutting or tearing would be worse–personally I think I would rather be cut oh-so-nice-and-neat, rather than rip like a banchee and have all crooked stitches and….well, anyhow~you are young, healthy and fit and I am sure that everything will…….comeout………without a hitch!!
Ugh, i wish wish wish i could be one of those peeps that does not know what a “you know what” is….. years back as a young girl i learned from someone else and have spent the last 10 yrs terrified at the very thought of it….. Kuddos to staying lucid during that class!
Just adding my two cents as well . . . I second what Lisa said, about it better to tear than be cut. My doctor recommended AGAINST an episiotomy for the reason that if a paper is cut, and you tear it, won’t it tear worse where you cut it than if you just tried to tear it w/out the cut? For whatever it’s worth, I’ve known what one is all my life (but never seen pictures – ugh!), as my mom had one, and so I grew up TERRIFIED of one. So I was glad he recommended against it. I ended up tearing, but didn’t even know I did until I was being stitched up – never felt a thing – tearing or stitching, so I had all those years of worrying for nothing. So it wasn’t a big deal at all (to tear) for me and I don’t remember any pain from it at all. (But I won’t lie, labor’s not fun, I tried to go natural, decided I couldn’t make it, so I got an epidural, but had no complications and no C-section!). LauraC
This post and all the comments have me feeling a little light headed. lol
I remember on the 1st episode of ER, they have Noah Wylie’s character do the head between your legs thing… I tested it a few months ago during a hospital visit after my nephew had surgery… no idea what made me feel faint, but that trick worked to keep me upright!
I like to be informed and all but pictures simply are not needed!
AACH! I’m sorry! Pictures! No, mama, no!
Traumatically and in a cruel twist of fate, I first heard of an episiotomy from my husband. His Mom is a delivery nurse and he knows way too much about this stuff. I really though he was trying to scare me and didn’t believe him. But then I learned the truth. I’ll never look at the world the same way.
Good for you for holding it together!
please don’t be frightened or concerned about labor and delivery….I hate that all this preparation for childbirth makes the process seems so mechanized. I had a normal, epidural assisted delivery with my 1st child, and a natural delivery with my 2nd (gave birth on our stairs trying to leave to go to the hospital–long story). Anyway, I loved the birth experience, it was the most natural thing in the world and to fear anything is like saying you’re afraid to poop….not saying this to be mean, just to give you a sense of how natural the process is. Leave your options on the epidural open, needle fear be damned–you may be glad you had the option. Also, Do get a Doula—she’ll make sure that you have the birth that you desire and give you lots good advice. And I’m not a fan of episiotomy, in fact, most doctors use it as a last resort–any tearing (which you wont feel) seems to heal better than an episotomy. I only had one stitch with my first, and not tearing whatsoever with my 2nd. I felt like a million bucks after that 2nd delivery. Just my two cents.
i also wanted to leave my two cents. research, research, research and do what is best for YOU! episiotomoies may be a quick fix, but can have many side effects. side effects that your doctor doesn’t have to deal with, but that will affect you for years. i did not want one, and my doctor knew this, but when i was most vulnerable, she asked me, and of course i was in no frame of mind to think about that. that was over a year ago, and i am still having some problems. (not that your doctor would do that!)
just know that you don’t have to go along with your doctor if you don’t feel comfortable with it!
You’ll be fine. I’m right there with you in the “less information the better for me” club when it comes to birthing babies. I never even took childbirth classes!
I had 2 BIG babies (8lbs. 8oz. and 8lbs. 15oz) and I didn’t have episiotomies with either of them. See, not everyone has to have one!
Good luck!
Long time reader, first comment-sorry D that you had such a traumatic time!! I’m an anesthesiologist and a mom- so I know a bit about epidurals :). I’m also not a fan of needles when I’m on the sharp end. Ha. It is NOT TRUE that epidurals increase your chance of C/Section and in fact a well managed and well timed epidural can speed up labor for some women but helping the woman relax. Just let the anesthesiologist know that you have a fear of needles and s/he will do all they can to help you, if that is the way you want to go. Personally I left the tear/cut decision in the hands of my OBGYN and was very glad I did. And that’s enough about that! š
So, I’ll be damned if I don’t get a C-Section when that time comes.
One word.
“Epidural”
Been there.
It’s like a case of champagne poured down your throat -takes the edge off, but you’re still in the party.
Counting the days girlfriend.
Whoa. Some of these replies are making me almost as nauseous as that class was–eek!
Thanks to many of you for your supportive words and well wishes–it really means a lot! :hugs:
Apparently my reply is too long to do in one comment, so I’ll need to break it up a bit here.
For those of you who didn’t know what an episiotomy was and googled it–I warned you! I can understand the instant regret. Totally. Oh how I wish I had my innocence back.
@Jennifer (L&D nurse)–Thanks for your advice and recommendations! I should clarify that my only “birth plan” is to be flexible and open to whatever is needed to have the healthiest and least traumatic delivery for my baby as possible. I’m not opposed to getting an epidural if I feel I need one, however, I am also not planning on walking in and asking for one right off the bat. I plan to play it by ear, and above all I’m really trying to stay focused on being flexible and open-minded. At my clinic you see 4 OBs on a rotating basis throughout your pregnancy and one of them is guaranteed to deliver your baby. One of those 4 doctors is who gave this presentation, and before I started trying to block out what she was saying, she did go over their rates of epidural use, C-sections, and episiotomies. I don’t remember their exact numbers (G probably does) but I do remember being very impressed (and relieved) to hear that all were quite low. She also informed us that the decision to do an episiotomy is one they will not make without consulting with us first during the L&D process. I’m sure at that point if it is needed I’ll be saying cut away! (Althought it still does make me nauseous to think about right now.) You mentioned walking around during labor, and I am hopeful I will be able to do this and remain active during most of my labor. I know our doctors encourage it as well, however, it is not an option once you have an epidural (the “walking epidurals” are not an option here). Thanks again for your comment; I really appreciated it!
@Jill–Your high heel fun fact is awesome, lol! Thanks for sharing. I hope your theory holds true!
@HG–Thanks for keeping it real! I appreciate hearing your story. And little Avery was quite the acrobat, lol!
@Erin–Coughing? I never knew that. Thanks for the tip!
@The Brick Cottage–I’ve always had low blood pressure and would get a little lightheaded sometimes if I got up too fast, but NEVER like what I’ve experienced during my pregnancy. Since I’ve been pregnant my blood pressure is even lower and that’s had the most to do with the extreme light-headedness/near-fainting I’ve been feeling now. Before I was pregnant, conversations like the one at this birthing class would have given me the serious heebs, but it never would’ve gotten to the point where I’d nearly passed out. I seriously hope this goes away after the baby is born!
@Amber–Your comment made me lol! I should’ve clarified that the pictures were graphics–really graphic graphics–but not actual photographs. At least that’s true for the ones I saw anyway. One glance and my eyes where on the ground for the rest of that part of the presentation!
@LizzieBeth–Sorry! But I totally warned you, lol! Doesn’t it just make you want to cross your legs and never uncross them again?
@Rose–Thanks for the tips!
@K*OS–Thanks for the recommendation! I actually haven’t bought any yet, so I’m glad you mentioned it.
@Celeste Lux–Thank you so much for your comment. It was really comforting to read your thoughts on how natural delivery is. That has been my thought all along. I feel like my body will just know what to do and will do it. If you read my reply to Jennifer above you’ll know that my only “birth plan” is to remain open-minded and flexible. I want to do whatever it takes to have the healthiest and least traumatic delivery for my baby that I can. Some of the L&D talk really gets me so queasy right now, but honestly if I need to have an epidural, an episiotomy, and a C-section when then time comes, so be it. If that’s what’s best for my baby, bring it on.
@Anonymous–Thanks for your comment and words of advice. I’m sorry to hear you’re still dealing with side-effects from yours a year later. That can’t be easy.
@Katie–Thanks for the advice!
@Centsational Girl–You never fail to make me smile. LOVE your epidural analogy, lol!